Special Sauce

A mish-mash of twisted thoughts from a fevered ego. Updated when the spirit moves me, contents vary and may have settled during shipping. Do not open towards eyes. Caution: Ingestion of Special Sauce may cause hair loss, halitosis, and a burning sensation while urinating.



So with one week to go before the big day, I'm thrilled to say that not only am I done with my shopping (with the exception of a bottle of wine for my present exchange at work, and some stocking stuffers), but everything that is at my house is wrapped, and I did NOT KILL ANYONE!

That last part? Minor miracle. I got up around oh... 6:30 this morning, watched a neat show on giant squid, and got my ass to Target by 8:00, when it was reasonably empty. Finished there, went to the outlets by 9. Hit my 2 stores there, did Burlington & *shudder* wallyworld (to be fair, I went in to get flannel pants for my dad, because nobody had any that weren't hideous, and t's to go with the PJ pants I got my mom- And yes, I could have gone back to Target, but it wasn't on my way). By 10:30 AM I was pulling into Giant to get stuff to make for supper tomorrow, and cookies today.

And seriously? Giant was the most crowded place of all- full of idiots who couldn't decide between the 1.98 can of tomatoes or the 1.99 can of tomatoes. Here's a penny, Chester, now how 'bout movin' your ass.

The cookie list is relatively small this year- Almond Joy cookies (making their debut, and will most definitely return- recipe to follow) and Grandma's date-nut candy (recipe also to follow), and probably peanut blossoms. If I can cajole/wheedle/plead with my mother, maybe she'll make the shortbread kiss surprise cookies I love (but hate making).

The recipes:

Almond Joy Cookies:

2 bags (5.5 cups) flaked coconut
1 can sweetened condensed milk
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1.5 teaspoons almond extract
1 bag hershey kisses with almonds

Mix the first 4 together and drop by spoonfulls (or make little balls- just wet your hands and it's easy) onto a cookie sheet that has been lined with foil, greased, and floured (trust me- don't skimp). Flatten the balls slightly, and bake at 325 for about 15-17 minutes. Rip 'em out of the oven and press a hershey's kiss into the top of each one, then remove to a cooling rack. (hint: if things start to stick, wet your spatula)

The recipe says it makes 4 dozen. They lie, it's a lot less.

Date Nut Candy-

1 big whonkin' bag of coconut
1 pound chopped dates
at least a cup or more of walnuts (chopped)
1 can sweetened condensed milk

Mix that whole mess together with your hands (remove your jewelry, or I'm not responsible for you) and press it into a liberally greased baking pan and bake at 300 degrees for about 45 minutes to an hour (you're looking for golden brown) cool in the pan, then cut into small rectangles (like a half inch to an inch wide by 2 inches long) and shake them in a bag of granulated sugar. It will refrigerate or freeze well, and frankly, it's just not Chrimmus in my mind without 'em.


Blogger parcequilfaut said...

I wish I was domestic enough to make cookies, but I just get my mom to make extra, or go and mooch them off the Moose's father-in-law.

My Crimmus is also complete, except for a $15 gift card that I can pick up at basically any point and/or the next time I go to Kroger, whichever comes first. And I do almost all my wrapping Christmas Eve, anyway. All that remains, other than the gift card, is a trip to pick up the books I ordered, which should happen tomorrow.

I hope you are well! Have a good Crimmus!

7:24 PM  

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