Special Sauce

A mish-mash of twisted thoughts from a fevered ego. Updated when the spirit moves me, contents vary and may have settled during shipping. Do not open towards eyes. Caution: Ingestion of Special Sauce may cause hair loss, halitosis, and a burning sensation while urinating.


Note to Self

When looking at food the wrong way will give you heartburn (Thanks again, Topamax!), taking your famously tasty spicerack chili to work without a bottle of Tums is a really, really stupid thing.

Spicerack Chili contains the following:

Beef Stew Cubes (cut into small pieces)
Lean ground beef
an onion
4 whonkin' big jalapenos
one really big can of small red beans
one regular sized can of dark kidney beans (all beans drained/rinsed)
3 small bottles v-8
1 small can tomato paste
1 can tomatoes with jalapenos

healthy doses (to taste) of the following
chili lime seasoning
chili powder (in abundance)
cumin (in abundance)
taco seasoning (low salt, for the love of God)
red wine vinegar
cocoa powder
Mrs Dash Salt Free Southwestern Seasoning
Black Pepper
adobo con pimiento

Brown the stew cubes (seasoned with adobo) in a dutch oven, then remove from pan, add the ground beef, onion, and 1/2 the jalapenos, break up and brown, as it's browning, add a good bit of chili powder and cumin, and a bit of oregano (good time for the taco seasoning too, if you like). When the beef is brown, add back in the stew cubes, your tomato products and juices, and the beans. Stir, add the other seasonings (reserve the cocoa powder for the end) and adjust for consistency. Youw ant this vaguely soup like right now, because you will cook the hell out of it.

Aim for a simmer/low boil, stir often enough to keep it from crusting fast to the bottom, and keep it going for about 1 and a half to two hours (long enough to tenderize the stew cubes). Add in the remaining jalapenos about the 1 hour mark. When it's just about finished, make a final adjustment of seasonings, add teh cocoa powder (makes a deeper flavor- maybe 1 teaspoon or so, and a dash of sugar if it is too acidic. Reheats well, can be served over rice, or plain. Top with sour cream, cheese, or not. Just be sure to have some tums handy!


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