Reason #41,489 why Alton Brown is a God.

Sure, Rachael Ray has her "You won't be single long vodka cream pasta" recipe, and you know what? It's not that great. I served it once, and got dumped shortly thereafter. Not a big dude magnet, that stuff. However, Alton Brown's Meatloaf Recipe?

With a few minor tweaks, every dude I've served it to has raved, and offered to marry, or do other kinky things to me. So. without further ado we have...

AB's Matrimonial Meatloaf

(note. This does not mean Sauce's gettin' engaged. It does mean Sauce is into the alliteration.)

P.S. All measurements are approximate. Measuring's for sissies and pastry chefs.

2 pounds ground beef (I use a pound of 90%/10% and a pound of 85%/15% because I HATE greasy meatloaf.)
2 slices Rye Bread (With seeds!) cubed and yes, it has to be rye bread.
1 regular to largish yellow onion, small dice
2 eggs
3 Tablespoons Red Wine Vinegar
1 Tablespoon Worcestershire Sauce
1 teaspoon Paprika
3 tablespoons Ketchup
1-2 cloves garlic, all whacked up finely
1-2 pinches red pepper flakes or a good dollop of hot pepper sauce
1 1/2 Teaspoons kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon pepper

Sweat your onion in a frying pan, when it's almost all cooked, throw in the garlic, that way you don't kill your dinner partner.

Once that's done, mix up your egg, and dump that into the ground beef, bread, salt/pepper, red pepper, paprika, vinegar, worcestershire sauce, onions & garlic, ketchup and, well, everything really... mix it together well with your hands.

The first time you make it, keep the pan you did the onions in handy, and take a little piece of the mixture and cook it in the pan, to make sure you like the seasonings. If it's to your liking, whip it all into a loaf pan, and bake it for an hour and fifteen minutes at about 350.

WARNING: This meatloaf throws off a LOT of liquid. Seriously. It's not all fat, but it does shrink up a lot. Be sure to put your loaf pan on a rimmed baking sheet so your oven doesn't hate you. after the meatloaf sits for a few minutes I kinda dump the liquid off off and let it go from there.

It's not the sturdiest meatloaf in the world (it's a little crumbly when you cut it), but as Mr. Baltimore said yesterday, it's in his "Top three of all time" for meatloaf, and kept ALL of the leftovers. I'm pretty feckin' proud.

Serve it with potatoes that you've mashed with a carton of reduced fact sour cream, fat free cream cheese, dried onions, a little bit of celery seed, and a beaten egg (they'll be really runny for mashed potatoes, till you bake it for a half hour-45 minutes till set and hot in the middle.)

Yum!