Special Sauce

A mish-mash of twisted thoughts from a fevered ego. Updated when the spirit moves me, contents vary and may have settled during shipping. Do not open towards eyes. Caution: Ingestion of Special Sauce may cause hair loss, halitosis, and a burning sensation while urinating.


For the love of all that's holy

And I apologize in advance, because you're not going to care, but I need to vent.

People. People. People.

Ok, so I've never hosted a massive fundraiser, but even I can see some fundamental problems here.

1. You entrusted getting the location you wanted, on the date you wanted, to the flightiest, flakiest, bitchiest drama queen on the planet, and you were surprised that he fucked it up.

2. You settled for a different date at a different location, and told everyone about it.

3. You changed your mind, went with a TOTALLY different location, and sent out your save the date cards.

4. Now you decide you don't want to have the event at the new (third) location after all, and have decided that you may go back to the other (second) place on a THIRD date. (Bearing in mind that 1. the save the date cards went out, 2. all publicity has mentioned location #2. 3. you have 9 days to have the invitations designed, and to the printer for the event which will take place at the end of May.

4.a. You will wait until the end of the 6th day to decide on anything, and wonder why nobody can complete the invitations for you (which have to be designed from scratch).

5. Your committee doesn't show up for meetings, because you scheduled them (in your infinite wisdom) during the day, when most people who don't have a. trust funds or b. husbands who are doctors to support them have to Work.

6. You volunteered to do a million asks for sponsorships, but will probably neglect to do them till a week before they're due, and wonder why nobody will cut you a check.

7. Instead of telling the bitchy drama queen from #1. to go sit on it and rotate, you continue to let him disrupt the actual proceedings, and demand all manner of ridiculous accomodations, and attempt to take over. He fucks up the simplest of tasks, and provides absolutely nothing positive to the group, in fact- his presence is highly un-nerving, and detrimental. Yet. Still. He. "Participates."

8. The event is in about 2 1/2 months. NOTHING IS FINALIZED. This is ridiculous.

Seriously, you have no idea how half-assed this thing is. I can only do so much, and when I do provide a service (at the last second, because invariably, even if I ask the day before the meeting, you won't give me any clue what you want till an hour before we have to be there) you bitch because it's "not right". Fuck.

At least the newspaper is hiring an HR assistant. I could do that in my sleep.

I promise, something funny later on today, to atone for my bitchy venting. Now, I shall go dance about my office to "Istanbul not Constantinople". Oh how I love you egg radio.


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