Special Sauce

A mish-mash of twisted thoughts from a fevered ego. Updated when the spirit moves me, contents vary and may have settled during shipping. Do not open towards eyes. Caution: Ingestion of Special Sauce may cause hair loss, halitosis, and a burning sensation while urinating.


It gets worse.

OK. Scroll down and read this morning's post. Go ahead. I'll wait.

Good. So you know it's hinty-bazillion degrees below zero today. And I was in total cocoon mode for work today. The final layer count was wool socks, wool clogs, long underwear, jeans, long sleeved shirt, sweater, pullover, mittens, before I had to go home. To put on a skirt. Yeah. A skirt. And ouchy shoes. To go to the Capitol. Which is 43 miles away.

And I call, to get directions, and totally make it there without incident. However, I find an open spot a block and a half away. Now, in the summertime, a block and a half is nothing, however, when it is hinty-bazillion degrees below, that block and a half, coupled with the 4.9 trillion steps outside make for shredded lung meat. (Lung. It's what's for dinner.) Picture if you will, Sicily, 1919. Wait. Wrong imagery.

Picture if you will, me. Trotting up the capitol steps, in a skirt, ouchy shoes, gigantic pink mittens, and a tinselly Christmas Tree. The Security guards were amused, and let me walk through the metal detector with it. so I could have had a bomb or a gun in my pocket, and it wouldn't have mattered, because I was spreading christmas cheer! And death! So, I trot this stupid tree up the steps in the rotunda, and finally arrive (wheezing) at my destination. The Lieutenant Governor's office. Where the security guard lets me BARELY fork said tree, card and tree skirt in the door, before I am shooed back out again.

That's right. I got dressed up, drove 43 miles, hiked a block and a half plus steps in the subzero cold, got laughed at by security for .4 seconds of face time. FIE! I wore mascara for this! So I drove home, picked up lunch for my ma and I, ate with her at the codger corral, and headed back to work (still wearing the ouchy, dangerous shoes). Only to find my PC still doesn't work, and it's still none-too-warm in my office. (With the heat cranked up to high, and the blower on full blast, it's putting out the thermal equivalent of an EZ Bake Oven.)

This is the point where I said "to hell with this" and came home. And did some work. I've decided to take the rest of the day (all 2.5 hours I would have had left) as "work at home" time. (I did actually do work too!) It's also prime laundry time.

Did I mention it's warm in my house?
Well, not like sauna warm, but warm enough that I don't have to wear long underwear and mittens.



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